does anyone see?
hear?
witness?
the violation?
the violence?
the trauma?
what they took from you?
when they took your body.
like it belonged to them.
does anyone care?
do the courts?
the judges?
what is justice?
justice is something you have never known.
they always walk free.
there is always an exuse.
They didnt mean to.
they are in charge.
shut up.
dont make a fuss.
its none of your business
Certainly not a woman’s,
business,
Not one like you anway.
you stand out too much.
you are too loud.
shut the FUCK Up.
okay.
i fall silent.
i have no fight left in me.
i give in.
i guess i was always going to give in,
give up，
fail,
loose.
and no one cares.
no one wants to make a fuss.
and so,
i am out in the cold.
freezing.
icicles forming across my hard edges.
and there are many.
hard edges.
formed through neccesity.
through every scream i was unable,
or not allowed,
to let out.
through every violent rage I, and you, turned inwards.
on yourself.
Bleeding.
Washing away, stinging.
light red, diluted and flowing down the drain.
Away from here.
you do not know how else to be.
it is too much.
The humilitation,
the isolation,
the loss,
despite the fighting, kicking, screaming and clawing.
you will always lose, you think.
i nod, slowly.
crying,
muscles tense,
heart and chest heavy,
useless,
a burden,
And for what?
to endure more?
pain?
humiliation?
violation?
grief?
in the name of who’s god??
certainly not one i know
or will ever know.
at least,
i doubt it.
i do not believe.
in myself.
in anything, at all.
Only giving in, and the black depths of tartarus below.
finally.
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